Grief....

Can this month get any rougher?

The unbelievable heart wrenching sadness I felt on Friday December 14th was so deep.  All those first graders, gone suddenly.  I just keep picturing what it would be like if that were MY first grader.  10 days before Christmas and suddenly one of the pride and joy's of your life is gone inexplicably?  Too much, too painful.  The sadness lasted for days, the praying went on and on. 

But, just as time heals all wounds, each day passed and the pain and sadness got less and less.  I don't think it will ever go away, but it lessens. 

Following the footsteps of a friend, I started 27 random acts of kindness for the victims of the Sandy Hook shooting.  Now, I regularly do Random Act of Kindness (RAKs), but this time it's bigger and better and more intentional.  Yesterday I put a Christmas card with a $10 gift card in it to the local grocery store in the cart corral area.  I have done 8 so far over the past few days.

On Friday afternoon my friend calls.  She is crying.  She says "Holly's husband is dead".  What?!?!  Our friend Holly's husband Dave went to go to work Friday morning and his car wouldn't start.  So, as he often does, he decided to run to work.  Except this time he didn't make it.  Somewhere along the way he collapsed and died.  The large assumption obviously is a heart attack.  No one has any doubt that Dave is in Heaven. 

But there is so much more to this story.  Holly and Dave have 3 young children.  Their oldest is the same age as Courtney (6), in fact his birthday is within days of Courtney's.  Their middle one is 4, and the youngest is 3.  The youngest was adopted from Ethiopia and brought home this past March.  This is her first Christmas with them. 

And their adoption story is LONG and painful.  So many of us walked through that journey with her and Dave that had some heart wrenching twists and turns. 

To know Holly is to have a light in your life.  She always has a smile and a quip to make you laugh.  Yet, she is tuned in emotionally to her friends and their needs.  Once you meet her, you want her as a friend for life. 

They are a young family.  They were not prepared for the sudden death of the breadwinner.  Thankfully she has a very large and amazing group of friends and family and an account is being set up for them that we can all donate too. 

I know how sad I have felt the last 48 hours.  I can not even imagine how Holly and her kids feel.  For the past 48 hours they have not been far from my thoughts at any moment.  She posted to Facebook this morning asking for her friends to help carry her.  In any way I can, I will take part in carrying her. 

I ask you reading this to keep this young family in your thoughts and prayers.  They are deserving.  They are a wonderful and amazing family.  So many of us just want to hug them until the pain goes away.  We are all grieving with her and for her.  It's all so unreal. 

So hold your family close and tight this Christmas.  Be thankful you are together.  It is a gift you have for today, but who knows how many more todays we will get together. 

I love all of you and thank you for reading.